by Chris Litsey
Alphabetizing my bad habits
Becomes an increasing
Challenge as the years begin to slip through my shaking fingers.
Drinking was the first one I noticed as an adult;
Entertaining nights;
Friendships forged in alcoholic flames
Gathered with each shot and sip.
Happiness didn’t come from those acquaintances,
Igniting a deep longing in me
Just I discovered my next bad habit:
Keeping toxic people around me because they would
Listen to me; they knew I needed them.
Making do with terrible souls
Nearly killed me,
Opening me up like a gutted trout, or
Perch if you prefer.
Questioning my choices, monitoring my emotions,
Rationing my time, my next bad habit formed
Slowly: rampant mistrust.
Truly, this has been the hardest habit to endure.
Until recently, I thought I might be better off alone,
Venturing into the unknown world full of my own
Wanderlust without worries of monstrous humans ruining things.
X’s and O’s: that’s what I really want though:
Years of love and laughter.
Zealous, I crawl out from under my anxious ways and move forward.
© 2025 Chris Litsey All rights reserved.
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